Deadlines are sort of like giant hammers.
They’re very unpleasant to be on the other end of.
Deadlines are like asteroids.
They can kill you at a blow.
Deadlines are like vampires.
They drain you of life and health
(And make you pale, skinny, and lethargic).
On the other hand,
Deadlines are a fantastic excuse to have coffee.
They make Facebook look one hundred percent more interesting.
YouTube turns into a magnet.
Chocolate becomes the staple of your diet.
When people start to write to you and ask you
“How far away are you from meeting this deadline?”
You turn into an ogre and want to yell at everything.
But you reply all nice and politely and try to act sane
Even though your brain is putrefying
And spilling out of your ears.
Once you have met your deadline,
You transform magically into a really nice person.
You feel all accomplished.
You go around drinking wine and spending time with people –
Until the next deadline comes around
And turns you into a raging hermit
Who eats unhealthy food and never exercises.